Shannon Andress from “You Got This! – The Journey” podcast joins Clément to talk about a whole variety of topics relating to personal growth, mindset, abundance, manifesting and attracting your dream life, physical health, relationships and more. This was an excellent, positive conversation that has a bunch of insight and tips for you if you’re on a similar journey of growth.
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[00:00:00] Clément: Maybe you can tell me a little bit about. Yourself w like what it is that you do and how you got into it and how you help people, your clients, and all of that.
[00:00:12] Shannon: Yeah. So I started my podcast back in March of 2020. So during the, um, or March of 20, 21, I’m like, what year is it? Just feels like a total blur, um, March of 2021.
[00:00:28] So all of 2020, I mean, I was home and I was working from home with my boyfriend. We were going through buying a house together. We were going through such an exciting time in our life, but I was suffering so badly mentally. Like I was just having these severe anxiety attacks with everything going on, and I wasn’t able to be present or appreciate everything in life and just find that happiness anymore.
[00:00:51] And so I, myself went on my own journey during that time. Where I went through therapy for the first time I started doing a lot of self-love [00:01:00] practices more throughout the day, like things that I’ve just never, ever done. And it really was something that I committed to myself and I always tell people.
[00:01:08] This past year, I was very selfish and I’m not afraid to say that. I think it was good that I finally took time for myself and decide to acknowledge these things, you know? And so after going through that journey and seeing how much I could improve and make a change in my life, I was like, I got to help people because I know there’s other people this past year who are struggling with their mental health, who are feeling alone, feeling like, you know, there’s so many people out there who have gone through so much worse.
[00:01:33] Do I really have anything to complain about? And there’s so many people just left in the dark right now with their mental health issues. And so I was ready to be the voice. I wanted to create a podcast where I could talk about the struggles that I went through so that hopefully I could help somebody else who was going through kind of the same thing and also not be the expert.
[00:01:51] Right. Just be the person going through it with them, our friend, somebody who they can relate to. And then it was so crazy after I started the podcast. Like [00:02:00] so many listeners were reaching out, asking for advice on their relationships, uh, mental health mindset, things like that. And I thought, oh my gosh, like I need to be more ready and available.
[00:02:09] I want to start working one-on-one with these people and have them be my clients where we can really get down to like what we need to change in their life to get them to where they need to be. And so I became mindset coach and Ben through that. This is such a long answer for you, but, but, um, I also became so passionate about fitness during this journey to work on my mental health.
[00:02:33] So I became a group fitness trainer and I’m becoming a certified personal trainer. So I’m just like trying to get all the resources to help everyone. So to answer your question, it’s full coaching now where it’s mindset, um, body nutrition, everything so that people have every resource and tool they need to get to that happier and healthier place that they’re trying to get.
[00:02:55] Clément: Um, okay. Yeah. So I see where you’re coming from. It’s like you went through just [00:03:00] like many other people I think get into this kind of industries. They go through the actual challenges themselves first, and it’s such an eyeopening, enlightened enlightening experience that they’re like, oh my God, if only other people knew about this, like if only other people knew how to do this or be this or think like this.
[00:03:19] And I relate to that a lot because I’m a zealot. So by nature, whenever I learn something that’s helpful to me, I always just want to run out there and tell everybody about it and like, Hey, have you heard about this new to her body hack? Or have you heard about this new thing? Uh, and, and I’ve, and I’ve kind of like, I, I really appreciate that because we need more people.
[00:03:40] I think we need more people to share their experiences, you know, and you can see this whole flurry of, um, emerging professionals that are in the mindset, you know, kind of industry or the mental health industry, whatever you want to kind of call it, um, that weren’t there before, just [00:04:00] because of what happened during COVID.
[00:04:01] I mean, how, how, how, how impactful was it for you? Like what were the takeaways that you got, uh, how much has your life changed since you were, um, you know, put on this path?
[00:04:17] Shannon: Yeah. You know, I, I don’t know why this is the first thought that comes to mind, but there were so many hard lessons that I had to learn when I was going through this period of reflection through therapy and through self-love where I think for so long, I was going through the motions of the same friend groups, the same job, the same routine.
[00:04:36] And then once I really got down to, okay, who do I want to be in? What do I want my life to be? I unfortunately realized that I was surrounded by a lot of toxic negative people. My career wasn’t really serving me in the way that I thought it was. And so it made me take a look at my life and go wait, You want to have this life, nothing you’re currently doing right now and nothing that’s surrounding you is supporting that.
[00:04:59] [00:05:00] So how do you expect yourself to get there? And so I think for me, I really had to take a step back and realize that a lot of things had to be removed from my life, unfortunately, but. You have to go through, I think those struggles and that decluttering, if you will, right. To get to the better place. And so now I finally feel like, and I hate to be morbid with it, but it’s like if I were to die tomorrow, I finally feel like I have an impact and I’m doing something where like I’m helping people in the world and I’m not just this blurb, that’s filling space.
[00:05:33] And that’s kind of what it felt like before. And so now I just feel like it’s finally living life through purpose and it brings me more joy. It makes me feel better about what I’m doing everyday gets me excited. It makes me feel like the work I’m doing is meaningful. And I don’t think I really had that before going through this journey.
[00:05:51] Clément: yes. And like you said, I think if you don’t experience what it’s like, or if, if you’re, if you’re [00:06:00] living life day to day, just kind of getting by like most people do, I would say, right. I mean, it is really most people that live on a, on a day to day, month to month basis, you kinda like get drawn into routes and paths and places that you didn’t initially think you were going to be in and you didn’t want to be in.
[00:06:21] And you just kind of, it’s cozy to a certain degree. It’s like a bubble it’s like comfort. Okay. You know, what’s going to happen, you know, what to expect and so fine. But I think it requires a certain level of disruption. Like you said, to break that pattern and give that perspective, essentially. I think what we’re talking about here is perspective.
[00:06:41] How do people get perspective? And before the pandemic. You know, that I think inherently getting perspective, especially the kind of perspective that you would need to start thinking differently about really important foundational, uh, life situation is not [00:07:00] comfortable. It isn’t a comfortable, uh, process, you know, breaking that bubble or popping up bubble, which is what happened to me.
[00:07:09] Is it depending on how, how controlling you are of your environment and how, uh, closed minded or open-minded you are, however you want to say it. I think it really will be like the, the, the, the, the medicine is, is, is equal to the poison, right? It’s like the same w if you’re, if you’re incredibly toxic, if you’re in an incredibly, uh, you know, um, undesirable position in life, and you’re not happy, I think the cure is going to feel pretty terrible.
[00:07:42] Right, because you’re going to need to change a lot, to be able to get to where you want to be. Um, but, but you know, having said all of that, this is where the mindset coaching comes in. Right. What, what is mindset coaching? Give me a run through of that.
[00:07:57] Shannon: Yeah. It’s, it’s so funny because when I first [00:08:00] started mindset coaching, my boyfriend, my family, my friends were like, wait, people are going to hire you to do, or like, I don’t understand what is a mindset coach.
[00:08:09] You know, it’s such a new term. Like people, like you said before, it just really started coming out. I feel like this past year, when there was different people wanting to support others, going through mental health struggles. So really what it is is it’s going through with somebody. They will tell me exactly, you know, what their goals are, where they want to be, but what are the current obstacles and struggles that are preventing them or those roadblocks that are limiting them from getting to their full potential.
[00:08:35] And really, if I had to say the biggest part of mindset coaching is. We’re asking the client questions that the client isn’t asking themselves. So it’s forcing some things that maybe subconsciously right, are being pushed back in the back of our brain that we’re not able to get to, but a question or a series of questions that your mindset coach ask is asks of you brings those answers forward, right?
[00:08:57] And it helps you to get to what it is that you need to be [00:09:00] doing. Because I think what too many people do is that they sit there in the comfort of what they’ve been doing all the time. They know they want to change. How do I do that? It seems really scary. It’s safer for me to sit here and our brain does that to us.
[00:09:12] Right. It’s protecting us. It’s keeping us safe in our comfort zone. So there’s so much work to push yourself outside of the comfort zone, but also know how to push outside of the cover and zone. Right? So I think it’s really just giving those answers. And also when that negativity, that imposter syndrome, those self doubts start to creep in the right tips and tricks to get through them, to where they don’t hinder your growth.
[00:09:34] And they don’t stop you from getting to where you want. Yeah.
[00:09:37] Clément: Um, okay. Yeah. And, uh, I’m actually thinking of, well, what, what are most people’s goals when they come to you? Like, do they come to you? And they say, I want to, I want to have a life like this. I want to be like this. Like, what does it look like when you first encounter a new.
[00:09:56] Shannon: Yeah. You know, it’s interesting because I have clients that have come to me [00:10:00] from all different ages and points in their life, but they all are coming from the same place of something is lacking. And I don’t know what it is. I don’t know what’s missing in my life. You know, I’ve worked with young people straight out of college who just are not happy in their career.
[00:10:14] They know they need to make a career change. They have no idea where they’re meant to be. And then I’ve worked with people who they just became moms and, you know, they’re, that’s a whole new identity and they feel like maybe they’ve lost themselves now having children. And they don’t know where they want to go with their life, but all of them, what they have in common is that there’s just something that’s lacking.
[00:10:32] There’s something that’s not fueling that fire in their soul. That’s exciting them. And they feel like they’ve just identified as the busy bee at work, the hardworking mom, you know, all of these different titles, but they don’t have a title for themselves. If that makes.
[00:10:49] Clément: and okay. So let’s say, cause I’m trying to kind of clarify the journey that someone would go through when it comes to any kind of mindset coaching, right.
[00:10:59] I mean, [00:11:00] where they begin and where they end and what the journey looks like. And, uh, what are the usual challenges that people face in order to move from? Let’s say where they are now to where they want to be their ideal version of their self and their life and their experience. Like what are the major things?
[00:11:18] The stumbling blocks that people expect.
[00:11:22] Shannon: I think one of, one of the biggest ones that I see is that we know we need to make time for a change or make time to take this next step and, and whatever it is, if it’s the new career, the time for yourself, or more time with family, there’s there’s time that we need to find, well, where are we finding it?
[00:11:37] And there’s so much discipline and motivation that you have to take to get there. But also it’s really not that hard. Like I think if we all think about it, you can sit on your phone in the morning and be on Instagram for 30 minutes. Right. Did you have to scroll through Instagram or 30 minutes or could you have taken time to meditate, go for a walk?
[00:11:56] Like, why are we choosing things that aren’t serving us? Right. We [00:12:00] make the choice every day. What’s, what’s going to affect us. So why not make the choice of the things that we want in our life? And so I think so many people they’re lacking that discipline to find the time. So it’s really structuring out, okay, what are the steps that we can do to get.
[00:12:13] And also, I think so many people think, I always compare it to running a marathon. Like people know they want to run a marathon. Right. And that is like the end goal, but that’s all that’s on their mind. And so they’re not thinking of every small step they have to do to get there, to be the marathon runner.
[00:12:29] And so they give up, they don’t know where to start. They stop. So it’s introducing the small steps that we have to be so proud of and excited to do, but also finding the time for them. Right. So it’s getting those steps, but knowing how we’re going to start putting it into our everyday life.
[00:12:44] Clément: Um, I think he touched on some really juicy topics there because you know, there’s a lot to this.
[00:12:49] Isn’t there. It’s you say it’s simple. And I agree with you. I do, but it’s not easy. It’s so, so hard [00:13:00] emotionally, psychologically, socially as well. I mean, come on. Let’s think about this. So if you’re going to make massive adjustments to your life experience, we are social animals. And a lot of the experience that we have comes from the people we spend the most time with.
[00:13:15] Now, a lot of us have a great friends and a lot of us have not so good friends. Maybe some of us have great family. Maybe others have not so great family. And one of the first things that I’ve witnessed in my own journey down this road to being the best version of myself, let’s just call it that. Um, is to make sure that I surround myself with the right people and that’s meant getting, you know, getting enough courage to say, okay, I’m going to have to curtail or spend less time with this person.
[00:13:55] Or I’m going to have to just completely remove that person from my life for now, at least while I deal with a lot of stuff [00:14:00] that’s going on, or, you know, I’ve, I’ve heard of people, luckily I’m not in this situation, but I’ve learned of people and I’ve had friends who literally just walked away from their family, you know, not forever, maybe, but at least in indefinitely because that experience and that environment was so dear, it was damaging and troubling and it was not letting them have that space to get ahead.
[00:14:26] So, uh, I think if you know, this is really just the outline, how much you may need to actually consider. As a, uh, as a potential change in your life to actually get to where you want to be emotionally, uh, psychologically, physically, all of those things, right? I mean, Yeah.
[00:14:50] Shannon: You know, it’s so interesting because there’s so many different levels you can go into when it comes to the relationships in your life.
[00:14:56] Like there are the people that you may have to just cut out [00:15:00] completely, right? There just could be those toxic people where it’s really hurting you and your growth. But there could be that group. And I mean, this is my situation. Like I have a great group of girlfriends. They will be my best friends for life.
[00:15:12] I love them to death. They’re awesome friends. Are they the friends though that I need in this journey that I’m going on? No. And that doesn’t make them bad friends. It doesn’t make them bad people, but they’re not going to help me when it comes to mindset, manifestation, anxiety, and different things. I’m going through.
[00:15:27] That’s a different tribe. That’s a different group of people I had to go to. So, you know, and that’s why things like clubhouse and social media can be so beneficial. As you could find those tribes in those communities to turn to for that new step that you want to take in your journey. Um, the other piece I wanted to bring up because I, you know, No, that there’s a lot of people were family.
[00:15:47] It feels like, okay. I can’t just completely cut them loose, but they’re definitely not helping me on my journey. That’s where boundaries are key. Like, it is so important to set boundaries and know exactly how to [00:16:00] be in those relationships and how much you’re going to give. So that’s not completely depleting and taking everything out of you.
[00:16:07] Clément: Does that like, okay, just to talk on the subject of boundaries for awhile, does that like basically involve communication, right. Would you say that that’s the major role of communication and setting boundaries is, uh, I mean, you know, because when I didn’t have a great relationship with my father, I didn’t feel like I could actually do anything about it, but the moment I opened my mouth and started exploring my feelings with him, it was really hard to do that, but changed everything.
[00:16:43] Okay. The first feedback that I got from him was like, oh, you’re being ridiculous. Oh, this is just a non-issue or you’re being weak. Oh, you’re being right, because that’s the kind of, you know, father that he was very strict, very Asian [00:17:00] and, um, you know, Asian, Asian parenting is pretty strict as what I’m saying.
[00:17:04] So when I started to communicate with him and tell him how I felt, I feel like I kind of gently pushed through this invisible barrier that was separating our emotions and our communication and our connection. And as soon as I got through everything changed, like now I have a great relationship with my father, but I think people feel a little concerned about, you know, being vulnerable with the people who’ve maybe they felt hurt by at times, you know, not understood or judged.
[00:17:35] How would you go about helping someone to get in that, in that.
[00:17:40] Shannon: Well, the worst thing that all of us do myself included is we create the outcome before we’ve even had the conversation, right. We sit there and we have the fake conversation in our head. We know what their response is. We know how they’re going to react.
[00:17:53] They’re angry, they’re throwing things or they’re crying or whatever. We we’ve created the worst case scenario in our brain. [00:18:00] So that stops a lot of people from having these vulnerable conversations, because they’re convinced of the outcome that they’ve created in their head. Really you, you have to kind of give this person a bit more of a chance than you are in your head.
[00:18:14] You know what I mean? They’re not a mind reader. They have no idea how you’re feeling or what you’re going through. And so it’s important that we express what it is that we’re going through to that person to give them the chance to prove themselves of how exactly, you know, they feel in the relationship and how much they’re willing to help us in our journey.
[00:18:31] So you have to, I think have that conversation, not only to, to give them a chance, but also to tell yourself, like I did everything on my end, you know, there’s nothing left for me to do. I didn’t leave that person in the dark. There was no secrets. I gave them all the tools and honesty that they needed. And if they wanted to continue with the relationship, then it was on their responsibility.
[00:18:53] But I think we just need to stop creating the outcomes in our heads because that really does stop us from having that [00:19:00] mechanism.
[00:19:00] Clément: Right. It’s like, I know how this is going to add and it’s not going to feel good. So I’m going to avoid it. But, but, but remember they have their judgements of us too, and their judgments are based on how we’ve always acted with them.
[00:19:12] So once we break that pattern, they can start to question, you know, and change the way that they interact with us. And I, I feel like, yeah, that was that, that, that was a huge thing for me. And, and, and so, you know, on the, on the subject of relationships and the ones that are closest to you, and how do you deal with that?
[00:19:32] I think that this was a really good kind of nugget of wisdom that, you know, we’ve kind of brought to the surface here. It just, you just got to show someone, you know, that you mean well, that you want things to work out and that you’re willing to make the effort. And I think that’s enough. Like you said, that’s, that’s all you can do.
[00:19:49] And if that doesn’t work out, then you did your.
[00:19:52] Yeah. And, and you know, one of my favorite quotes is what you resist persists. And it’s something that a lot of people say when it comes to [00:20:00] anxiety. But I think it also plays into what we’re talking about with relationships here. You know, you resist it, you let it sit inside of you, it festers and brews and boils until all of a sudden, boom, the explosion where you freak out on this person, or you put your hands up in the air and say, I’m done.
[00:20:15] Right. And we let it brew for so long. It’s persisting to where it gets like so negative and toxic. So we don’t want to get to that point. Right. We don’t want to get to a point where we’re feeling bad or we heard that person when we could’ve saved the relationship. So yeah, I think it’s so important to have this conversation.
[00:20:32] These are very emotional subjects and they do bring a pout, you know, things like anxiety, anxiety, attacks, panic attacks. How have you dealt with anxiety? Even if it’s not for yourself, how have you helped people deal with anxiety? What, what kind of things do you implement or.
[00:20:52] Shannon: Yeah. So, um, I was having severe anxiety attacks during the pandemic and for anybody who has not [00:21:00] had an anxiety attack before, it is literally the worst thing that I’ve ever experienced.
[00:21:06] Like if I could throw it up out of my body or having surgery to remove this, like I totally would like it, it sucks, you know, and some of the physical results can be so intense. And I don’t think a lot of people know about it. Like I will be violently shaking and unable to control it. Like heart palpitations, like crazy, like unable to breathe and just sweating profusely.
[00:21:27] I mean, it’s, it’s such a physical thing that takes over the entire body. It’s so intense. And I was having them every day during the pandemic. It was terrible, but I ignored it for so long because I’d never dealt with this before. And then finally through therapy and through some practices that I learned, I was able to.
[00:21:46] Get through it. And I’m happy to say I haven’t had an anxiety attack since I don’t, I don’t even know months. Like it’s, it’s been a long time, but because I’m, I’m very strict to taking care of my mental health now. So I was pretty [00:22:00] adamant, I mean, nothing against going on medication at all, if that’s on your journey, for sure.
[00:22:04] But for me, I wanted to make sure I tried an all natural solution before I got to that point, just to know, okay. If I do have to go on medication, at least I tried every option, you know, there was before that. Um, so
[00:22:16] Clément: you, you, you consciously chose to go down a natural non-medicated path first to see if this was something you could kick or do.
[00:22:26] Without bringing in pharmaceuticals.
[00:22:28] Shannon: Yeah, because the first therapist I went to, I switched therapists, but the first one I went to, she offered it immediately asked if I’d be wanting to go onto anxiety medication. And I was like, well, we’ll no like, I mean, do I have to be like, can’t we see if this is just, I don’t know if this is a phase.
[00:22:44] I don’t know if it’s a lifelong thing. Like I’ve never gone through this before, you know? And then even my, my second therapist who I switched to had offered it as well. And I asked if we could please do an all natural approach just because I wanted to make sure, like you said, and luckily she was able to help me find [00:23:00] that all natural approach.
[00:23:01] So, um, there’s a couple of different things that I did. I mean, meditation and journaling. have been Huge like breathwork and really taking time to like eliminate that anxiety and stress it’s sitting with me has been super, super helpful, but I also use supplements that are all natural plant based solutions to help just kind of give my body some of the things that’s lacking.
[00:23:24] Um, if anybody, you know, is curious, like B complex is just a great natural supplement that anybody can use to help them with their anxiety or magnesium glycinate. That’s also a really good, um, on actual supplement that people can use. But these are solutions that I take them every day. I do my mental work, like the mindset, um, meditation and journaling.
[00:23:46] And it’s really helped me a lot.
[00:23:49] Clément: Yeah. It’s such a lazy way of medicine. I think when someone comes to see you and the. Course of action is literally okay. Take these drugs. I feel personally, [00:24:00] I mean, okay. My father is a pharmacist. My brother’s a pharmacist by trade. You know, they’re not practicing anymore, but I feel like at least I can talk about it to a certain degree and I studied natural health and university.
[00:24:11] And so it’s kind of like to, I see these, I see these problems from two perspectives. I do understand that pharmaceutical can help, but I do also believe personally, and I’ve had a lot of, um, feedback from doctors and studies and reports that, you know, we over-prescribe, and it leads to problems in society.
[00:24:34] People who have chronic issues that are now hooked on drugs. And I don’t know what your opinion is on that, but do you feel like there’s a lot of, uh, you know, just everyday people who have unfortunately, you know, gotten used to taking the. Forms of dealing with anxiety and are completely oblivious to the fact that, you know, perhaps this is not something [00:25:00] that even needs to be suppressed or kind of like medicated and really the solution is going within figuring out what it is that’s causing this and, and, and, and, you know, confronting it.
[00:25:14] Right. You know, not, not necessarily in an aggressive way, because confrontation has a connotation that there’s going to be some kind of violent, uh, situation where, you know, you’re fighting with something. But what I mean is, you know, like you said, if you don’t ever. Open your mind to, or, you know, put yourself in a position where you’re actually facing what it is that you’re, you’re having challenges with.
[00:25:40] You’re always going to be plagued by them and it’s probably going to get worse.
[00:25:44] Shannon: Yeah. You know, it’s, it’s such a slippery slope with this and I’ve talked to so many people because there’s so many sides of it. Like, you know, I think especially somebody that went through it, like it really bothered me that immediately as somebody who’s never dealt with this [00:26:00] before first day going into therapy, that’s offered like.
[00:26:04] I feel like we should try everything else before we get to that point. And it was just very off-putting and you know, I’ve spoken to people who unfortunately have been misdiagnosed as well, and they thought they needed these medications for so long, but because they didn’t do these other practices to help identify it, right.
[00:26:20] They were, they were forced to be put on these, these medications. They maybe didn’t have to. And unfortunately what happens for a lot of people when they start to go on medication is eventually other issues. Come up, you get another medication to help with the, um, side effects of that first medication you started, then another medication help with those side effects and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
[00:26:38] And all of a sudden you are on this grocery list of medications that possibly could have been avoided. Had you been told of an all natural approach right? From the start. And I’ve spoken to so many people about this because it’s just so unfortunate. How many people have been misdiagnosed? I mean, anxiety.
[00:26:55] I forgot which one and I’m sorry, I’m definitely going to mess this up if add or [00:27:00] ADHD. One of them it’s like the most common misdiagnosis when it comes to anxiety. And so there’s just like so vague,
[00:27:07] Clément: I think it’s cause it’s so vague, right? There’s so there’s a such a blurry line between what ADHD is and what a some, maybe something like something else is.
[00:27:17] And I feel like, you know, um, I don’t want to demonize the pharmaceutical and medical industry, but it’s not done a historically good job of showing us that we can trust it to make the right choices and the right decisions for our health. I mean, it’s a very lucrative industry. I’m my father knows it. My brother knows it and they admit it.
[00:27:39] They admit that, you know, it’s probably overprescribed in this, probably a lot of conditions that exist that maybe are just fancy names for things that are all about, you know, let’s do something about our physical health or our mental health. Let’s look into it.
[00:27:54] Shannon: Well, and that’s, that’s the craziest thing is like so many times when people go to [00:28:00] doctors with these issues, rarely is the first thing offered.
[00:28:04] Have you tried exercising? Have you tried changing your diet? It’s immediately going to the medication. I just feel like there’s so many shifts we can be taking in our life to help us be before we have to do that. And again, like I said earlier, like if you have to go on medication, that’s part of your journey.
[00:28:19] That’s fine. But you definitely should be trying, I think other options before having to get to that point.
[00:28:25] Clément: Yeah. Yeah. Well, I think we both agree that there’s a lot that can be done there and it’s probably not something you’re going to witness in mainstream. You know, there’s not going to be a, a new special about, you know, living a healthier lifestyle, most likely.
[00:28:43] Right. So it’s going to be down to people like you and me. Uh, and, and, and, and any of the great teachers that we’ve seen on social media that are really pushing for more holistic health to start shifting the, and it [00:29:00] has started shifting. I think, you know, we see that with a lot of the indie ma uh, brands emerging over the last decade where, you know, coffee or, um, certain types of food.
[00:29:11] Uh, and, and even now, I think even now there’s a lot of investment in things like, you know, mental health incorporations, uh, as a program for people to actually, you know, experience at least on a regular basis now. Um, so yeah, it’s promising, it’s a promising move in the right direction. We’ve just seen too many people succumb to.
[00:29:34] Overdoses and, you know, I mean, most of the time it’s celebrities, we hear about Heath ledger or, um, any of the others that we’ve seen, but it’s just the tip of the iceberg. I mean, this happens to a lot of people you don’t know about overdose, or just get, uh, you know, Dr. Jordan Peterson recently talked about how he had to be weak.
[00:29:53] Like when he was weaned off of an, I can’t remember what medication it was, basically, it was, uh, some kind of [00:30:00] antidepressant medication. He, it’s the one where you can die if you get weaned off of it. Right. You’re so hooked on it, you know, systemically that it’s, it’s gonna mess with. And it really did. And he almost died.
[00:30:12] They had to go to, uh, Ukraine and Russia and get all of these different types of treatment. Um, and luckily was able to survive, but that that’s scary stuff. And I, and I hope that no one ever finds themselves in that situation. Um, I’m just a big believer in. Personal power. I’m a big believer in taking control and, you know, making your own future.
[00:30:36] And I think, yeah, you’re right. There’s situations where people might need this kind of help. But I think overall in general, I think we’re, we’re, we’re, we’re really, we’re really in need of just a lot more personal power. So, but you talked about, yeah. Sorry, go ahead.
[00:30:49] Shannon: No, I was just going to say like, I, I cannot agree more with you.
[00:30:52] I think that we’re constantly looking to everybody else for the answers you go to the doctor, you go to the blog, you [00:31:00] go to the social media page, you go to your friend, you go to whoever, right. You’re looking for answers from everybody else. And you’re not really taking any time to look within, like you said, that self, you know, empowerment that you can be finding and seeing what it is that you need.
[00:31:13] I think that that’s so important.
[00:31:15] Clément: Um, that’s why I really liked my own personal time in COVID. I couldn’t do anything else. I was single I couldn’t date. I couldn’t see my friends and. It was like, well, what, well, what do I deal? And so I just ended up well thinking, okay, I’m going to have to spend this time in a productive way rather than drink myself to death.
[00:31:36] So I stopped drinking. Um, I started meditating. I started to confront the thoughts and the emotions that I’d been had been surfacing. Now I could feel them. It was uncomfortable to be alone. All of a sudden I was like, why does my chest feel heavy? Right. That’s the anxiety and the negative energy starting to show up again.
[00:31:58] And, oh, my, [00:32:00] it was, it’s just great to be able to imagine what would happen if. You know, uh, if, if we were back in the day in a tribe and we, and we didn’t have social media and we had to literally make the best friends and family out of the people around us and what kind of person I sometimes think about this, what kind of person would I be?
[00:32:23] Would I be more grounded? Would I be more confident? Would I have a clearer mind? Would I be able to make better decisions? And I think the answer is probably 99%. Yes. Although, you know, I might not, might not be so fun to hang around with, but, uh, I asked these kinds of questions all the time. I was going to ask you, you talked about discipline earlier.
[00:32:44] Discipline is one of the topics I want to talk to you about. And I wanted to kind of ask you how you feel about discipline. Given that it’s one of those things that gets in, it gets a bad [00:33:00] rap in many, in many cases, right. We learn the word in school when we’re supposed to do our homework and we’re supposed to do things we don’t want to do.
[00:33:07] And don’t like, what do you feel is important in someone’s journey from going from where they are now to where they want to be? How does discipline fall into that? And where does passion fall into that too? Like, what’s a difference to you?
[00:33:21] Shannon: Well, when it comes to discipline, I really think of, you know, the word motivation, which a lot of people don’t like that word.
[00:33:28] Either. People think it’s like this made up word that everyone’s searching for motivation where the heck is it? You know? And I get that. And I think for discipline and motivation, there’s one thing that you need to find to be able to get that. And that’s your, why. Why do you want to be at that point that you want to be in your life?
[00:33:47] You know, I have this, this guide that I put together, it’s the five ways to stay motivated in your exercise routine. Because so many people that yo-yo diet yo-yo workout, you know, going up and down, doing it, not doing [00:34:00] whatever. And it starts with number one is finding your wife, okay. You want to work out every day.
[00:34:05] That’s not your, why what’s your, why? I okay. I want to be healthier. Well, why do you want to be healthier? What is the why? And if the why then eventually comes down to, because I want to be here longer for my children, for my family. And I, I want to be able to participate in the activities and the family events that we have.
[00:34:23] Like, that’s your, why that’s that present illness? And that’s that relationship that you’re doing this for. And so once you find that you can start to surround yourself with different motivators and there’s different tricks, tips, and tricks, but it’s all going to come back to that. Why? Because on the days that you want to give up the days that you don’t feel like getting out of bed and doing the things that you want to do, you’ve got to come back to that.
[00:34:45] Why that’s that’s the reason that you show up for yourself every day?
[00:34:49] Clément: Um, would you say that the more clear you are with your why the less discipline you need and the more passion you get for what you do or.
[00:34:59] Shannon: Well, I [00:35:00] think the more you find out your why, the more disciplined you are, I think the discipline actually will go up because I think that when you know exactly what it is that you want, and you’re more focused on your why, because I think too many people, they start, they stop at that surface level.
[00:35:14] Like I want to lose weight. I want to be healthy. I want to fit into that outfit. You know, I want to wear a bikini, like that’s so surface level, you’ve got to go deeper into what that is going to give for you, right? How is that going to help you in your life? And once you find that you’re so much more disciplined because you don’t want to let that thing down, right.
[00:35:32] It’s something that you want to achieve so badly. And I think that passion comes from. Uh, I believe that once you’ve found what it is that you want to be doing and your, and you’re dedicated, there’s a passion for it that comes out of it that eventually blossoms. And it grows because I don’t think people start being passionate about working out right.
[00:35:53] The first day they’re tying their shoes. They’re getting lenses, that first piece of gym equipment thinking, what am I doing? But the [00:36:00] passion grows. Right. And you become passionate about it because of all the things that it’s given you and how much it’s helped.
[00:36:08] Clément: yeah, I can chime in on that. I mean, I I’ve worked out for most of my life and I think the reason why a lot of people start working out is not because they want to be healthier or fitter it’s because they want to look better and feel better about themselves psychologically and emotionally.
[00:36:28] And I think that’s an okay thing to want and I still have that need. And that’s one of the main reasons why I go to the gym even today. And I think, but the cool thing is that with, so this is why, okay. I listened to, uh, uh, Russell brand podcast sometime ago. And he was, he was talking about how. You had a guest on and he was talking about how, you know, he was aware that he had a huge ego, right.
[00:36:53] And the guests said, yeah, but the ego is a good thing. It’s a good thing for you because without the ego, you wouldn’t be where you are today. You [00:37:00] wouldn’t have learned all of these things and you wouldn’t have had these insights and had that journey. And I think, I think we, we, we, we have to be, we have to be realistic and not demonize, you know?
[00:37:10] Um, it’s a balance, not demonize the ego too much because it does give us fuel to get to where we want to be. And I’m coming from the, at this, from a very personal perspective because I do not enjoy. The feedback I get sometimes of some of the things I’ve thought said and done that have been driven by like an ego.
[00:37:30] Right. Uh, and I kind of think to myself, oh my gosh, why did I do that? But ultimately I’m only human. And I think it’s totally okay. As long as your intentions are pure and as long as you’re, you know, you want to be the best version of yourself, um, you can work with that.
[00:37:48] Shannon: Yeah. You know, it’s interesting because you, you make me think about something when you’re talking about ego and you know, if somebody else calls you out for something that you did.
[00:37:57] And sometimes I think that [00:38:00] we can have the best of intentions, right. And we’re working so hard to be better for ourselves or help others. And somebody could be still trying to bring us down. I mean, that happens to everybody there. I mean, Oprah Winfrey has haters. Like there’s not a single person. That’s like not going to have somebody against them, you know, but when it comes to two people knocking down your ego, right.
[00:38:20] And saying, you know, that you’re full of yourself or whatever. I think a majority of the time, that person, it’s an internal thing that they’re struggling with. And it has nothing to do with you. Exactly. Exactly. There they’re projecting. What is it they’re struggling with on you? You’re working out every day, you’re posting your gym selfie and they’re making fun of you’re talking about.
[00:38:41] They’re probably upset that they can’t get that motivation dedication that you have. Right. They want to be doing that the gym, but they can’t, they don’t. And they’re pissed off that you’re doing what they want to be doing.
[00:38:52] Clément: Absolutely. Absolutely. It’s kind of like a, let’s pull you back a little bit. So I don’t look, so I don’t feel as bad that I’m further [00:39:00] away, that I’m further away from where I really want to be.
[00:39:02] You know what, I’m going to admit something to you. I also feel that way sometimes. And, and I’m not ashamed to admit that because it’s, it’s a way from me to confront what there is still within me that needs work on. I can see someone and most of the time I’m like, yeah, I’m your cheerleader. But there’s some times I noticed that I get jealous and it’s a reminder that I’m not doing the things that I know that I should be doing or acting in the ways that I know I should be acting because I’m looking at this person and they are where I want to be, or they’re experiencing what I want to experience.
[00:39:38] There’s no way I can know that for sure. It’s a very superficial, uh, experience, but like, it just shows me, you know, there’s still work that I have to do on myself. And this is a journey. Just like your brand is you got this journey, right? I mean, it’s all a journey. I take pride in recognizing that, because now I can be vulnerable.
[00:39:58] Now I can be open [00:40:00] and I can communicate the truth when we look at Instagram and when we look at Facebook, right, what we’re seeing mostly is. A lie, which seeing the best possible Photoshop that most of the time, it’s just a filter, right. That comes with the platform. The is like, Hey, you want to lie about your life?
[00:40:19] Here’s a set of tools to do it. I’ve just realized that now it’s like, it’s like, we want to encourage you to be as fake as possible. So, um, yeah, we’re living in a time where most of the stuff we consume now is actually not realistic. And it’s so tough to remind ourselves about that and recognize that, oh my God, life isn’t really like this.
[00:40:42] Why doesn’t it?
[00:40:43] Shannon: I know, oh my God, I have the craziest story about this. So I post on my Instagram page reels and stories, and I’m constantly showing my face to connect with my audience. And every week I ask my podcast listeners to sending questions that I’ll answer on the podcast and it could be about like [00:41:00] me anxiety, business, like literally anything.
[00:41:03] And somebody wrote to me once they said, oh my gosh, your skin is always so flawless. Can you please share your skin routine? And I saw that and I felt. I felt like really guilty and like crap about myself, because that was like the best Instagram filter. I can’t do my face like that. So I whipped out my phone after the gym, I pointed out like every piece of dry skin in pimples.
[00:41:23] And I was like, this is my skin. I don’t think that you can achieve that. And it was like really eye opening to me that like so many people, like, we don’t even realize it. There’s people comparing to us, we’re comparing to others. And so I had to just like nip it in the bud because I was like, oh my gosh, I don’t want people thinking that I have perfect skin.
[00:41:40] Like I do not.
[00:41:42] Clément: You’re like, why don’t you recognize the S3 filter don’t have, where have you been, have you been under a rock all this time? Exactly. Yeah. It’s scary. I think I was using tick talk and re for the first time when I loaded up tick tock, I looked great and I thought to myself, hang on. I didn’t even set any [00:42:00] filters yet.
[00:42:00] So they automatically put a filter on as standard and you have to go into settings to remove it. So we are really, um, I, I feel like we’re in an, in a very. Unfortunate situation where, um, we are actively constantly having to remind ourselves that this is not real. This is not real. And that’s tough. That’s extra work to do everyday.
[00:42:25] I mean, come on. We didn’t need to do that. Once upon a time we were craving filters. At one point, we were like, hell, if we could have a filter right now, it would make my life so much better because I can’t stand looking at you, but now we’ve got too much of it. And I feel that we have to take it back a bit, but yeah, that’s just the world we live in.
[00:42:42] Shannon: I know, I know. It’s so crazy. Like sometimes I think social media is so good, but then I think social media is so bad. Like the good part of it is that we can connect with people. Like we’ve never met before or find that community, like I said before. And, um, I also think it it’s like we can market better than we ever were able to in the [00:43:00] past, like for businesses, you have free easy tools right.
[00:43:03] At your hands. Right. But the negative of it is like, there’s just constant. Self comparison. And a lot of people too, I think are living in a lie too. It’s not even that, like, it’s just the people viewing, but the people are putting out this facade of like, here’s my perfect life. Here’s my perfect relationship.
[00:43:20] And you know, all these different filters and features. And then when they’re not on there, they’re miserable. And so it’s so interesting. Like I do see good parts of social media, but then I’m like, there’s some really bad parts. Yeah.
[00:43:32] Clément: And this whole thing remember is an addiction, this whole platform, these, all of these major tech platforms like Facebook and they have become a, an addiction machine.
[00:43:44] They’re a drug now, uh, because it’s actually statistically proven or, you know, I guess you could say clinically proven that when you use social media for a certain amount of time, your act it’s actually like taking a drug. And when you remove it, you get withdrawal symptoms. So [00:44:00] where every time we get a notification, um, right.
[00:44:04] Or some kind of alert, uh, or even if it’s a type of comment or a type of reaction, we get a little bit of dopamine released and that dopamine hit is kind of similar to what you would get. If you were taking some substance, that’s not potentially legal. Right. So yeah, these are incredibly manipulative platforms that haven’t been regular.
[00:44:26] Yet as an actual substance abuse thing. Um, and, and so, but, so how do you deal with that? We’re talking essentially about like, so we’ve gone from discipline and passion and recognizing that there are a lot of challenges and obstacles in the way that are really tough to deal with. How do you set habits that are good for you and your clients?
[00:44:49] Because it is essentially getting into a routine and keeping yourself disciplined enough to become, to have that habit. Right.
[00:44:59] Shannon: Well, [00:45:00] it all depends on the type of person. Like I’m somebody where in order for me to stay on track with my goals and my routine, I have to plan out everything. And I mean, I’m planning out like the timeframe that I’m doing, social engagement to the time that I’m walking my dog to the time that I’m like sitting down and watching TV.
[00:45:19] And I know that to some people that. Girl show exactly. Everyone’s like, that sounds crazy, but like, I need to, because otherwise I get, I get lost and I’ll be on social media for far too long, or I’ll be focusing on something too long. And I didn’t, you know, spend time with the people around me. Like I, I have to be that discipline with myself, but for some people that’s not going to work.
[00:45:40] Some people might feel like a prisoner to like this structure in this routine and that’s really not benefiting you at all because now you’re just, you’re resentful towards this like, journey that you’re on. You’re not enjoying it. You’re not liking it. So I think it really is defining because for everybody it’s gonna be different.
[00:45:55] Like some people, it fits anxieties and it’s something with your, you know, [00:46:00] mindset where you need to introduce more positivity into your life. Then I’ll go through, you know, morning routine and how we can introduce them to your life. But if it’s something where you need a career change right now, and that we’re identifying, you know, the steps for that, that could be a totally different process.
[00:46:15] So to answer your question, it really is figuring out like what the exact struggle is. And then from there. Okay. What’s your current schedule? Like what’s your current life and how can we solely take those steps to introduce it to where this is going to start benefiting you? And you’re not going to feel like, Ugh, this is really just like taking out time in my life and I’m not enjoying this at all.
[00:46:36] Clément: Yeah. And you could kind of make a, uh, kind of a connection there between working out and how to work out in a way that’s sustainable and progressive and like kind of get a new habit with such as going to bed at the right time every night. I mean, um, or eating the right kind of things. I, I noticed [00:47:00] recently that the more that I try to personally write, the more that I try to block in time and stick to it every day, the less success I’m going to have because the kind of person that I am very creative and.
[00:47:17] Fiery and my emotions and my, and I just work better spontaneously. So I have to work with what it is that makes me, um, Excel. And I think we’re all different in that respect. But if I was, and I have to create a new habit, I would want to do it progressively start small and then kind of work my way up to it.
[00:47:41] And it’s just like going to the gym, you don’t want to overdo it. So many people overdo it on the first time and they’re like, I don’t want to do this anymore.
[00:47:48] Shannon: Yeah. And I think like that happens to a lot of people. I mean, I know for myself prior to the pandemic, I was somebody who would work out and be so strict for like a week or two.
[00:47:58] And then I fall off for like two months and I’m [00:48:00] like, what the heck? Why can’t I get in a routine? And it really was because. Mainly number one was I didn’t have my wife. Like it was such superficial reasoning that like, it was easy for me to go, nah, not going to go day. Who cares? But also, I didn’t know what exercise felt good for me.
[00:48:15] And there’s so many different types of exercise out there that everybody can be doing. Like you don’t have to run on the treadmill for an hour and then do a core workout, which is pretty much all I was doing. Right. You have to find what are you going to, to enjoy and have fun doing that workout to where you want to go do it every day.
[00:48:33] Like some people love kickboxing. I hate kickboxing classes, but Hey, that’s not for me. It’s for somebody else. You know,
[00:48:41] Clément: I totally agree with you. I could never do CrossFit. I’ve tried it before. I detest CrossFit. I’m the kind of person who likes to kind of take their time with working out, you know, and if I want to be intensive, okay, I’ll be intensive, but I’m not going to force myself to, to almost die, which is basically CrossFit for me.
[00:48:59] That’s [00:49:00] how I think of CrossFit. Uh, but there’s people out there who need CrossFit because they’re like, it’s not, it’s not working for me. I can’t, I don’t want to just blaze around in the gym and take my time. I want to kill myself every day because I feel good about it. So I get it. And I think the message really here is work with your strengths.
[00:49:17] But as long as you know what you’re doing, why you’re doing what you want to do and what your goals. Then I think it doesn’t matter how you get there as long as you get there. And we’re all different people and we all have different, um, different character traits. So, you know, there’s, there’s a different path for everybody.
[00:49:33] It shouldn’t be the same
[00:49:34] Shannon: forever. Yeah. And it’s so interesting because I’m actually a part of this 100 day challenge with three other coaches. And the four of us got together to help people finish out 20, 21, moving their body every single day and finally feeling good about themselves. But the thing that’s so special about it is that the movement is different for everybody.
[00:49:55] And it’s really shifting the mindset to realize the different ways we can move our [00:50:00] bodies. So, you know, it could simply be going for a walk or while you’re waiting for your soup to heat up in the microwave, you do squats. I mean, it could be anything, you know what I mean? Like you get creative, but you also learn to acknowledge.
[00:50:14] Is movement, right. It doesn’t always have to be that crazy workout at the gym. It could be just finding time in your house to just move your body a bit more than you were before. .
[00:50:24] Clément: Yeah. Yeah. And I have a diary that I write in every day that kind of reminds me about all these things. Now there’s so much that I guess the average person needs to remember every day that it’s almost impossible to, to, to consciously do that.
[00:50:42] You, you have to rely on your automation to be able to do everything that needs to be done everyday. But what you can do, I think is, is really put down on paper, the most important things to you at that specific time in your life, which is why. [00:51:00] Mantras and affirmation so much because you can tailor the affirmation to you.
[00:51:05] So you can only mention the things that are the most important to remember. I am focused and resourceful, right. Or I am powerful and whatever, whatever it is that you want to kind of encourage out of you, what are your thoughts about
[00:51:20] Shannon: that? So it’s, it’s something that’s very new to me this past year when I started this or past two years, I guess when I started this journey was I started introducing, um, visualizations after my meditation in the morning, and then affirmations to support the visualization of what I wanted in my life.
[00:51:38] And I’m at this very freaky time in my life. I’m going to call it right now where all of the affirmations I was saying back in March have come true. And it’s like, I kind of get like chills when I talk about it. Because when I first started doing them, I kind of was one of those people. How is this going to work?
[00:51:54] Like I’m putting words out into the, into the air. Like there’s nobody around me. There’s nothing, I’m just [00:52:00] saying these words out loud. I didn’t really see how an affirmation can work, but after, you know, committing to them and dedicating to doing them every day and now seeing the results, it’s like, holy moly, these people, we’re not kidding.
[00:52:14] This works. And now it’s something that I help clients with. And I tell everybody, you have to start using affirmations.
[00:52:21] Clément: Absolutely well were not neuroscientists. I don’t think I’m not for sure. I know that. What do you, think’s going on when we say these things everyday? And when it actually works, what do you think is actually happening there in the background?
[00:52:36] Shannon: Well, you know, what it is is I think everyone thinks affirmations is like, we’re putting magic out into the world. You know? Like we’re like saying these, like, I don’t know, spells that are going to come true. And it boils down to it’s simply just positive. Self-talk that’s what an affirmation is. It’s just positive.
[00:52:51] Self-talk where you’re giving yourself love. And you’re, you’re putting that belief that your dreams are not just dreams. They’re going to come true. That’s your [00:53:00] reality. It’s going to happen. So it establishes this confidence with the new, to where now, throughout the day, where maybe you want to take those small steps to get to that big goal.
[00:53:09] You’ve affirmed that’s going to come true. And so you can take these small steps, right? You feel good, you know, you’re getting to that next place. So I think it’s this, this confidence that we’re creating and, and again, removing negativity because we’re finding more opportunities to speak positively to our.
[00:53:25] Clément: Yeah, I think, I think you’re right. And for me, and even though I still have a lot of work to do when it comes to these kinds of things, but I have noticed that by saying it every day, It’s like your adjusting the balance of self-talk because a lot of my self talk is negative. And so the more that I allow that negative self-talk to thrive within me, the less control I have over my life, the more I kind of trick myself into being insecure or not enough, or, you know, a failure.
[00:53:59] And [00:54:00] that’s, I think what’s what’s happening is it’s, it’s kind of pushing that balance back to the point where now the majority of your thoughts are actually aligned with who you want to be and where you want to be so very powerful stuff. And the reason why I asked you about that was because like you said, a lot of people think is woo.
[00:54:15] And it’s never really discussed in a way that makes sense to logical people, but that’s really, I think what’s happening in the background. So, you know, if your logic. Uh, you probably could see the logic in that. And maybe now it makes more sense for you.
[00:54:29] Shannon: Well, and you know, something too, is that I think that a lot of people don’t realize how much we’re negatively speaking to ourselves throughout the day.
[00:54:36] Like it’s so like out of sight, out of mind, we don’t realize it. So something that I actually tell my clients to do when it comes to establishing, like what’s lacking in their life and what’s not going right, is I tell them, you know, have a journal with a pen with you. And throughout the day, when you feel that negative, self-talk come up of like, oh, I can never do that.
[00:54:56] That was so stupid. You know, I’m so embarrassed right [00:55:00] now, whatever it may be, write down the negative thing that you’ve just said to yourself and what happened that prompted that negativity, right? Like what made you get to that point? And I think it’s something that we have to do to really realize like when we’re being negative, because so many people don’t even realize like a majority of the day you’re being so mean to your.
[00:55:19] Clément: Yes. Yes. And that’s why in many diaries, not mine specifically, although mine does kind of ask that question in a roundabout way, in many diaries that are kind of like these well, what did you, what were your average, uh, emotions during the day on a scale from like positive to negative, like, and those kinds of questions.
[00:55:41] And when you fill in those questions genuinely, you can see a pattern over time of like, oh my God, I’m actually pretty negative as a person, or these are the recurring thoughts that I’ve had. So I find, although I don’t do a journal every single day, because like I said before, I’m [00:56:00] pretty kind of a spontaneous person.
[00:56:04] Um, I find that when I do do the journal, the insights are huge. Like I really find out a lot about me and how far I’ve progressed or how far I haven’t progressed since the last time that I actually did.
[00:56:15] Shannon: Yeah, it’s something that happened to me the other day. I was journaling because I’m studying right now to become a certified personal trainer.
[00:56:22] And for some reason I’m getting so negative. Every time I open up the textbook, like I’m sitting there, like, I don’t want to do this. I hate science. Like I had no idea how much biology this was. I just can’t do it. And so I decided to go to journaling because I was like, what is happening right now? Like, why am I coming into this with such a bad attitude and what’s going on?
[00:56:44] And so I started to write, and this is something that journaling too is like, I think it’s the same as the white can get very surface level where at first you go, okay, I don’t want to say today. And then you shut the book. No, like figure out why what’s going on. And for me, I had this moment, this aha moment of [00:57:00] wait a minute, like you you’re getting everything that you’ve been manifesting and affirming to the universe.
[00:57:07] And it’s all coming to you and you’re resisting it. Like, why is this resistance coming up? And I think there was like this bit of like fear in a can I really handle everything that I’ve been asking for. And it’s just something that I would not have come to the conclusion of had I not gone to journaling and figured it out myself.
[00:57:26] So yeah, it really does help a lot.
[00:57:28] Clément: Um, yeah. I mean, if you’ve got lofty ambitions, like you and I, and, uh, what I’ve noticed is my fear is what if I’m, what if I get what I want and all of a sudden I’m responsible for everyone else. That’s now somehow. You know, cause my, my, one of my main admissions is to help people and teach people, which is one of the reasons why I do this.
[00:57:54] And if I finally get to the point where maybe I’m, you know, very popular on social and [00:58:00] I got a lot of people commenting and asking me what happens if I don’t feel like doing it anymore one day, like what then? And that’s a fear that I have, and it’s kind of like a strange fear to have because you’re not even there yet, you know?
[00:58:12] And, um, hell if I didn’t want to do it anymore, I’d probably find something else to do. I don’t think it would be a tragedy, but we kind of, we hold onto these things as a way as it’s almost like a back door defense mechanism to keeping your bubble the way it is right now, so that you’re comfortable and you know what to expect and you don’t have to change.
[00:58:31] Shannon: Yeah, it really, really is. It’s us going? Oh shit. Do I want to go there again? Can I handle this? Let me stay back here. This corner I’ve been there for awhile. It’s a good place to be. Yeah.
[00:58:42] Clément: And uh, so personal growth is one of the major things that humans need, especially today. So we have to fight that, uh, by any means.
[00:58:51] Um, but what do you think about the law of attraction? I think, well, I think this is a, it’s always something that people talk about in the realm of personal [00:59:00] development, personal growth. What are your thoughts about, I mean, you’ve seem to be attracting it, but there’s a, uh, maybe a. Rhyme to the, well, I don’t even remember what the expression is.
[00:59:12] Maybe there’s some method to the madness is what I wanted
[00:59:15] Shannon: to say. Oh, it’s something that I need to, to learn more about. I was in a clubhouse room, um, and there was this guy giving a full conversation on it and he was talking about like how, um, the vibrations and frequencies that we’re giving off. It’s like, uh, things that are high frequency versus low frequency.
[00:59:32] And I was just like, oh, Gosh, there’s so much more to this that I don’t even know about. And I even had this woman come on to my podcast and she talked all about the cosmic love connection and how w how we attract our soulmates throughout the different parts of our, she talks about different lives, like people from past lives for future lives.
[00:59:51] And it was very interesting, but, um, it goes so much deeper than I ever realized, but it, to me totally makes sense. I mean, I [01:00:00] think you attract the people around you. It’s, it’s one of those things where I think a lot of people it’s like, oh, why do I always end up dating these jerks? Or why do I, you know, always get these jobs that I hate?
[01:00:10] Well, why do you always, like, don’t maybe it’s you, like, I hate to be that way, but it’s true.
[01:00:17] Clément: Totally really being someone who, uh, covers a lot of relationship related material, um, and also having dated quite a lot, you know, um, while I was single of last couple of years, I, I recognized how much of an invisible, uh, you know, phenomenon that could be to people, right?
[01:00:41] They are oblivious to the fact that they’re putting out this message, uh, which is subconscious by the way. Um, I’m not going to name names, but recently I dated a, a lady who, well, to me, it seemed very [01:01:00] much, uh, unhappy and also wanted to have a relationship. But the vibe that she was putting out was not the kind of vibe that I think chimes with people who are looking for relationships.
[01:01:13] Uh, material, it was more of a, kind of like a happy go lucky vibe. And I feel like people get tricked into certain habits. They, they, they learn it from other people. They learn it from popular culture and we know that popular culture is not a great indicator of what reality actually is. And so, you know, um, I agree with you.
[01:01:34] A lot of what we attract in life is a subconscious level thing. And therefore the tools we need to actually change our direction are things that we maybe haven’t thought about that much before, or don’t fully understand. And, and if we are honest with ourselves, we don’t really know. What this is all about, and science is great, but there’s a lot of things that it can’t [01:02:00] explain.
[01:02:00] So it just stands to reason that there’s a whole wide, vast, expansive, just unknown, you know, phenomena that were maybe learning about or don’t even know about yet. And so that’s why I feel like this is a great topic because, um, anything spiritual, anything in the realm of kind of attraction, uh, wavelengths, uh, frequencies.
[01:02:22] I truly believe in, although I don’t know how to explain it. I think it’s just one of those things that you have to experience.
[01:02:32] Shannon: Yeah. That’s how I feel too. Like, I can’t explain it. I don’t know enough about it, but like I fully, fully believe in it. And it kind of brings me back to, you know, whenever you hear of people who, you know, they found their soulmate, whether it be like their significant other, their friendships or whoever, they never were looking for them.
[01:02:50] Right. The person just appeared in their life. Like it was like, you know, I wasn’t looking for a relationship. And now all of a sudden this person’s here. Well, why do you think that happened? Right. It wasn’t being forced. It [01:03:00] was being attracted and, and that it happened. And they came into your life for that reason.
[01:03:04] Clément: Yeah. Yeah. When, like, when the student is ready, the teacher appears kind of thing. You know, you, you can’t, you can’t get w or accept what it is that you need until you’re ready to accept it. Um, I totally agree. What are the three things that you could perhaps. You know, if someone came to you and they were just starting out and they were saying, okay, I’m not happy with my situation.
[01:03:30] Um, uh, want to be the best version of myself? What are the first three things that you would kind of recommend they look at in order to start that journey towards being the best version of themselves?
[01:03:46] Shannon: Yeah, so I think number one what’s most important is kind of what I said before with finding throughout the day, what negativity you’re allowing in your life, right.
[01:03:55] That negative self-talk and where you’re not feeling your best. And it’s clearly affecting you. [01:04:00] So write that down in a journal and then what you can do to counteract that and really make the shift is you can change that negative into a positive, right? For example, if it’s somebody who said they, I don’t know if they’re calling themselves fat or ugly and they don’t like the way that they look right now, you can change it into my body is strong and has gotten me through so much to the point that I’m at now.
[01:04:23] And it’s going to get me to where I want to be. Right. It’s a positive. It’s not, it’s not, you’re not be asking yourself saying like I have the perfect body and I’m so happy with where I am, because, because your brain is going to go, no, you’re not. You just told yourself you don’t like where you are. So change it to something that’s believable.
[01:04:38] Like. I’m strong in my body has gotten me to where I am today. It’s going to get me to that next place to my body can handle anything that comes its way. You know, like
[01:04:46] Clément: that’s an interesting thing to touch on because maybe people think mantras or all about saying, I have an amazing body right now. Right.
[01:04:55] And, and, and I, yeah, I had never agreed with that. I’ve actually [01:05:00] met, it’s like a positive, false
[01:05:01] Shannon: positivity, right? Yeah. Uh, your, your brain’s going to go, that’s BS. Like I know you don’t mean this and I know you don’t believe this. And so you’re never really going to have the full effect of mantras and affirmations because you’re going to go, wait, why?
[01:05:13] Like what’s going on? So you have to make it something that’s, that’s believable. You know, it’s like, if somebody said they want to be a millionaire, you’re not going to say I am a millionaire because you’re going to go, wait, I still have my car payment, my phone bill.
[01:05:27] Clément: That’s one of the reasons why I never really liked watching the movie called the secret.
[01:05:31] Uh, I don’t know if you’ve ever seen it, but it’s what kind of, kick-started this massive movement of the law of attraction is this movie called the secret? I think it was a book first. And then it got turned into a documentary movie where they interviewed all these people, these practitioners of the law of attraction, and many of the people on there.
[01:05:49] And I don’t know if it’s working for them or not, but if it is all the power to them, but they’re basically saying the more you say something, the more you get it. So if you want to [01:06:00] get rich, if you want to have more money, you just have to tell yourself that you’re going to get a check in the mail every week.
[01:06:07] And I was like, okay, this is not, this can’t be true. And he was saying, and I got a check in the mail every week. And I was like, this smells really bad right now, you know, who’s going to sit at home and say, I’m going to get a check in the mail every day. I mean, it’s almost like you’re, you’re, you’re, it’s almost like you’re hurting someone’s ability to move forward and actually make that money for themselves.
[01:06:30] Because there’s effort involved in action, right? I mean, it’s, uh, the law of attraction to me is I need to, I need to know exactly what I want and then I’ll be able to take the steps to get there.
[01:06:46] Shannon: And I think that, that some people, those big mantras work for, but for me, they never do. And for anybody I’ve worked with, it never works for them either because they go, I know that none of this is true when I’m saying, but I think if it’s those [01:07:00] small steps of like, is that saying, you know, I am a millionaire.
[01:07:03] It could, you could say that dream is not far away. You know, I’m going to be making much more money than I did last week, every week. I’m going to prove it’s those small steps of, am I a millionaire yet? No, but there’s a ton of small steps that are helping me get there.
[01:07:18] Clément: There’s a crazy, uh, Jim Carey, um, talk, show segment, and it’s basically him talking to, I think it might be.
[01:07:29] About how he was a struggling actor. And he said to himself in on this date, on this year, I’m going to make a million dollars. And it literally happened for him, apparently he said. And, uh, but you know, it, it, again, it comes back to well, that’s, that’s the kind of approach that I think works. It’s something you can work towards.
[01:07:51] It’s not something you’re trying to trick yourself into being reality when it’s not anyway. So I didn’t want to do rail your firm from the three, the three things you were
[01:07:57] Shannon: talking about. No, I, I know the exact [01:08:00] speech that you’re talking about and I love that. And I think that’s kind of what he did though.
[01:08:04] Right? Like he knew that on that day he would make a million dollars or whatever it was. But until that day he had to book gigs and he had to take so many steps to get there. So he kind of was doing like exactly what you and I are talking about. But, um, so I think if you, if you change the, the negative that you’re saying everyday to a positive, and I tell people like overwhelm yourself with that affirmation, like set up like three alarms on your iPhone to go off throughout the day that have that as the text, right.
[01:08:32] That affirmation, that’s gonna remind you post-it notes on your mirror. I mean, anything that’s going to be that visual. That’s going to kick your brain to go remember this. You’ve got to think of that. You have to remind yourself of all these things that we’re trying to work on right now. The first thing would be to actively change the self-talk that you’re doing.
[01:08:49] And so journaling it and changing the way that you’re speaking to yourself every day and, and commit to it. Um, the two other things I would say is to find time, [01:09:00] really find time to just start meditating and meditation can be so many different ways for people. You don’t have to sit in complete silence with your thoughts.
[01:09:08] I mean, there’s podcasts, there’s apps that give you, you know, storylines and visuals to help you get there, or there’s movement meditation, where you don’t have to sit still, if you’re a fidgety person and you need to like have your body moving so that you can focus. Like there’s so many different things, but I think it helps us to release negativity in and clear out our mind for when that journaling comes or, you know, those ambitions and those goals that we want to set.
[01:09:32] It really helps you be much more clear in your intentions with them. Um, and then the, the third thing I would say is to make sure that you find time for moving. Every single day, I mean movement without technology movement, without anything like getting fresh air, getting grounded and, and grounding yourself, being, you know, in that movement, remembering all that you have to be grateful for.
[01:09:54] I think gratitude is so important. And if you want to find more positivity, like I [01:10:00] always write in my journal every day, five things I’m grateful for. And it’s five things that nothing could be taken from me. They’re not materialistic. It’s not like I would never say I’m grateful for my apple watch. You know what I mean?
[01:10:10] Like they’re things that I actually am grateful for. Like, I’m grateful that I opened my eyes this morning. Like how often do we just appreciate that small gift that we get? You know what I mean? But I think that was four tips I gave you. So I throw in that extra
[01:10:23] Clément: gratitude. I find stuff, you know, something just briefly, I just want to say movement is so underrated and it’s not even physical movement that I’m talking about.
[01:10:33] It’s also, you know, like if you think of all the great memory experts talk about. Saying a story or putting it in context so that you can actually link it to something. And that context is always something that’s moving because it’s, it’s something, that’s a story you’re telling yourself. And the more complex, the thing you need to remember, the more complex the story is, uh, right.
[01:10:58] I’ll just give you an example, like a [01:11:00] walked into a house and in the living room, there’s two chairs. And then I went into the living, uh, and then I went into the dining room and there’s like one table. It’s like a way of remembering sequences of numbers and that’s movement. And that’s why it’s important.
[01:11:16] Now, if you’re trying to build a new habit, a feel like pairing it with that move. Right. That physical movement of just like, I gotta do this routine. This is the routine I got to go through. Um, it’s going to be so much more effective than not having the routine in the first place.
[01:11:35] Shannon: Yeah, no, I was just going to say, I think like a lot of people too, they, they know they want to start something and they like try one thing one day and maybe another thing another day, and then it completely falls apart.
[01:11:45] So that routine helps you to like really give it a shot, you know, and see if you like it.
[01:11:51] Clément: Yeah, absolutely. Well, uh, I have had an amazing conversation with you. I think it’s been awesome to finally get you on the show. Um, [01:12:00] thank you for coming on. Is there anything that you want to share? Like I think you’re, you’re, you’ve got like a, a coaching and you have a newsletter that people can kind of sign up to.
[01:12:11] Shannon: Yeah. Yeah. So first of all, thank you so much for having me. This was awesome. And you are such a good host. This was like such an easy conversation. I absolutely loved it. Yeah. Yeah, no, of course. So yeah, people go to my Instagram page. It’s you got this underscore the journey. They could see the link for everything in there, but, um, my website, Shannon andrews.com, you can sign up for a free consultation call for my mindset coaching program, because I don’t want anybody to feel like they have to make a huge commitment to something they’ve never done before.
[01:12:41] So it’s just a free call to go over what it’s like, your struggles, your goals, and really see what the actual plan would be. And you know, which program would work best because I do one off sessions or a 90 day lifestyle change program. And it’s different for everybody’s journey. So you could definitely sign up through there.
[01:12:57] And then also my newsletter is on there with [01:13:00] podcast updates, um, mindset, coaching tips, and tricks, blog posts, affirmations, and just tons of things to help everybody on their journey. So, yeah. Can we connect with everyone?
[01:13:10] Clément: Yeah. And speaking of which, how do they connect with you on.
[01:13:15] Shannon: Uh, Instagram it’s you got this underscored the journey, and that’s pretty much the only place that I am right now.
[01:13:21] Clément: Yeah. Keeping it simple. I like that. Yeah. Well again, thanks a lot for coming on. Shannon really appreciated it and hopefully in the future. We’ll we’ll talk again.
[01:13:28] Shannon: Yeah. Thank
[01:13:29] Clément: you. Hey, thanks for tuning in. Make sure you subscribe today. You won’t miss the next episode. We cover topics like recovering from infidelity, online, dating, managing chronic anxiety, and so much more we’re on all the popular platforms.
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